malenky young devotchka (geesux) wrote,
malenky young devotchka
geesux

I want my own private jet. damnit.

The flight back to California was less than comfortable. Planes are already notorious for their lack of seat width and leg room. I just so happen to be the lucky bastard squeezed between my mother and an extremely overweight man.

Before take-off, my mother whispered to me that I should just move to another seat. We glanced around and found that it was a full flight. It also immediately hit me that there was no way in hell I could find someone nice enough to trade seats with me.

I spent the 5 hour plane ride in some sort of distorted fetal position. The guy sweated on me, almost stuck his ass in my face, and a strange musty odor seemed to surround him.

At one point during the flight... It crossed my mind that if the plane were to crash, how could I possibly escape the flaming wreckage. With the guy blocking the aisle, I pictured myself using my right arm, the only part of my body I could still feel, to pull my body up and over the seats.

I became religious upon the planes arrival to the SF airport. I thanked god that the flight was only 5 hours.. I skipped out of the airport and spun around with my arms out.


More to come...
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